how to win back your ex: 4 effective letter models!

Have you just broken up with your ex, but you can’t forget him? Do you want to make him/her understand that you still love him/her and that you are ready to change to get him/her back? Do you want to write him a letter to express your feelings, but you don’t know how to write it? Do not panic !

👉 In this article, we will help you write a letter to win back your ex. We will give you the rules to follow to write an effective letter, the pitfalls to avoid, and 4 letter models adapted to different situations. Follow the leader !

Why write a letter to get your ex back?

4 effective letter models to win back your ex

Writing a letter to get your ex back may seem old-fashioned or desperate, but it’s actually a very effective method of winning back the heart of the one you love. Here’s why :

1) Take a step back from the breakup

The first reason to write a letter to get your ex back is to gain perspective on the breakup. Indeed, after a separation, it is normal to be overwhelmed by emotions and not to see things clearly.

Writing a letter allows you to take stock of what happened, the reasons for the breakup, your faults and your virtues, what you feel and what you really want. It is a therapeutic exercise that helps you free yourself from your resentments and regrets, and regain your self-confidence.

2) Apologize for your mistakes

The second reason to write a letter to get your ex back is to apologize for your mistakes. Indeed, if you made mistakes that led to the breakup, it is important to recognize them and take responsibility for them.

Writing a letter allows you to apologize to your ex, without attacking or making him/her feel guilty. You show him that you are aware of your mistakes, that you sincerely regret them, and that you are ready to change so as not to repeat them again. It’s a sign of maturity and respect that can touch your ex and make him want to forgive you.

3) Be sincere and positive

The third reason to write a letter to get your ex back is to be sincere and positive. Indeed, if you want to win back your ex, you have to prove to him that you still love him and that you are optimistic about the future. Writing a letter allows you to express your feelings to your ex, without being interrupted or judged.

You tell him/her what he/she means to you, what you liked about your relationship, what you admire about him/her, what you hope for the future. You show him that you are sincere and that you are not playing with his emotions.

You also show him that you are positive and that you are not giving up. You make him understand that you believe in your relationship and that you are ready to make efforts to save it.

4) Reconnect gently

The fourth reason to write a letter to get your ex back is to reconnect smoothly. Indeed, after a breakup, it is sometimes difficult to resume dialogue with your ex, especially if the breakup was conflictual or painful. Writing a letter allows you to reconnect gently, without rushing or harassing your ex.

You give him/her time to read your letter, think about your proposal, and respond to you when he/she feels ready. You show him that you respect his space and his pace, and that you are not rushing or giving ultimatums. You open the door to possible reconciliation, without forcing or manipulating him/her.

As you can see, writing a letter to get your ex back can be a great idea to revive your relationship. But be careful, it is not enough to write anything willy-nilly. You must follow certain rules to write an effective letter that will make your ex fall for you. This is what we will see in the second part of this article.

What are the rules to follow to write an effective letter to your Ex?

the rules to follow to write an effective letter to your ex to get him back and win him back

If you have decided to write a letter to get your ex back, you must follow certain rules so that your letter is effective and does not produce the opposite effect than what you hope for. Here are some rules to follow to write a letter that will melt your ex’s heart.

1) Be brief and sincere

The first rule to follow is to be brief and sincere. Your letter should not be too long or too short. A letter that is too long risks boring or annoying your ex, who will not want to read it to the end.

A letter that is too short risks coming across as superficial or insincere, as if you don’t have much to say or offer. We advise you to write a letter of no more than one page, which gets straight to the point without beating around the bush. Your letter should be sincere and reflect how you really feel.

Don’t lie or exaggerate your feelings or promises. Be honest and authentic, without trying to manipulate or pity your ex.

2) Propose solutions

The second rule to respect is to propose solutions. Your letter should not just repeat that you love your ex and want him/her back. You must show him that you understand the reasons for the breakup and that you are ready to make efforts to change what was wrong in your relationship.

You must offer him concrete and workable solutions to resolve the problems that caused the separation. For example, if you broke up because of distance, you could suggest moving or traveling more often to see him/her.

If you broke up because of infidelity, you can suggest working on yourself or going to couples therapy. If you broke up because of a lack of communication, you can suggest talking more often or doing activities together.

3) Prefer a handwritten letter

The third rule to respect is to prefer a handwritten letter. A handwritten letter is more personal and more touching than an email or SMS. It shows that you took the time and care to write to your ex, that you paid attention to the form and substance of your message.

It also shows that you are unique and that you are not sending him a copy-pasted or generic text. A handwritten letter is more intimate and emotional than an email message. It can tell the difference between a letter that ends up in the trash and one that ends up on the pillow.

4) Demonstrate lucidity

The fourth rule to respect is to be lucid. Your letter should not be a sentimental delusion or a desperate plea. You must remain lucid and realistic about the situation and the chances of success in your reconquest. You should not idealize your ex or your past relationship. You should also not devalue or demean yourself. You must recognize your qualities and your faults, as well as those of your ex.

You must accept that your ex may have changed or evolved since the breakup. You must respect their choice and their opinion, without harassing or making them feel guilty. You must give him the freedom to answer you or not, without putting pressure on him or giving him an ultimatum.

5) Enter into a game of seduction

The fifth rule to respect is to enter into a game of seduction. Your letter should not be a simple report or an analysis report. You need to seduce your ex and make him want to see you again.

You need to remind him of the good times you shared, the things you have in common, the plans you had. You need to compliment him/her, tell him/her what you like about him/her, what attracts you, what you miss. You must make proposals to him, suggest that he meet again, talk, go out. You need to show him that you are still attracted to him/her and that you still have feelings.

6) Open your heart

The sixth rule to respect is to open your heart. Your letter should reflect your personality and your sensitivity. You must write from your heart, without being afraid to reveal yourself or show yourself vulnerable.

You must express your emotions, your feelings, your desires, your needs. You need to tell your ex how you feel about him/her, what you hope from him/her, what you are willing to do for him/her. You must be sincere and authentic, without acting out or lying.

Here are some rules to follow to write an effective letter to get your ex back. But be careful, these rules are not enough if you don’t have concrete models to inspire you. This is why we will give you 4 examples of letters adapted to different situations in the third part of this article.

Letters to win back your ex: 4 effective models

We have prepared for you 4 effective letter models to win back your ex according to different situations. You just have to adapt them to your case and your style. Please note, these models are not to be copied word for word, but to be personalized according to your story and your feelings.

Sample letter to get your ex back after an argument

Did you have an argument with your ex and he/she decided to break up? Do you regret your words or actions and want to ask for forgiveness? Here is a sample letter to get your ex back after an argument:

My love,

I am writing this letter to you to tell you how sorry I am for what happened between us. I know that I was unfair and hurtful to you, that I failed to listen to your arguments or respect your point of view. I know that I made you suffer and that you lost confidence in me.

I am not trying to justify myself or minimize my wrongs. I recognize my mistakes and I take full responsibility for them. I ask you for forgiveness from the bottom of my heart for all the hurt I have done to you. I also ask you to give me a second chance, because I love you more than anything in the world.

You are the most important person in my life, the one who makes me happy, the one who understands me, the one who supports me. You are my soul mate, my partner, my best friend. You are everything to me and I don’t want to lose you.

I know you are angry with me and need time to think. I respect your choice and I don’t want to force you to come back to me. But know that I am ready to make efforts to change what was wrong in our relationship, to be more attentive, more understanding, more respectful. I am ready to do anything to make you happy and prove my love to you.

I suggest we meet again to calmly discuss our situation, without arguing or reproaching us for anything. I think we still have a lot to say and offer each other. I think we can save our marriage if we really want to.

I will give you time to read my letter and think about my proposal. I hope that you will respond positively and that you will agree to see me again. I miss you terribly and think of you all the time. I love you with all my heart and I will prove it to you.

Your love waiting for you.

Model moving letter to get your ex back who is in a relationship

Have you found out that your ex is in a relationship with someone else? Are you jealous and want him/her back? Here is a sample letter to get your ex back who is in a relationship:

My heart,

I am writing this letter to you to tell you how much I miss you and how much I love you. I know you’re in a relationship with someone else, but I can’t accept this situation. I can’t imagine you being happy with anyone other than me. I can’t imagine that you have forgotten everything we experienced together.

You know, since we separated, I haven’t stopped thinking about you, about us, about our story. I haven’t been able to turn the page or rebuild my life. You are always in my heart, in my mind, in my dreams. You are the only person who matters to me, the only person who makes me vibrate, the only person who makes me come alive.

I know you’ve started your life again with someone else, but I don’t think you’re really in love with this person. I think you are with him/her out of spite, out of habit, out of comfort. I think you are lying to yourself and you are not happy. I think you still have feelings for me and you don’t dare admit it.

I ask you to think about what you really want, what makes you happy, what makes you tick. I ask you not to settle for a mediocre and passionless relationship. I ask you not to waste your life with a person who doesn’t deserve you. I ask you to give me a second chance, because I am convinced that we are made for each other.

I suggest we meet again to sincerely discuss our feelings, without lying to us or hiding anything from us. I think we still have a lot to say and offer each other. I think we can get our love back if we really want to.

I will give you time to read my letter and think about my proposal. I hope that you will respond positively and that you will agree to see me again. You are the most important person in my life and I don’t want to lose you.

Your love that hopes for you.

Sample letter to get your ex back who left you without explanation

Did your ex leave you without giving you an explanation? Are you injured and want to understand the reasons for your departure? Here is a sample letter to get back your ex who left you without explanation:

My angel,

I am writing this letter to you to tell you how hurt and distraught I am by your departure. You left me without giving me an explanation, without telling me what was wrong, without telling me how you felt. You left me in the dark, in doubt, in anguish. You hurt me like no one has ever hurt me.

I don’t understand why you acted like this, why you broke off our relationship overnight, why you disappeared from my life without a word. What pushed you to make this decision? What did you not like about me? What did you miss in our relationship? What did I do or say wrong? What can I do to win you back?

I ask you to enlighten me on the reasons for your departure, to tell me the truth, the whole truth. I’m asking you

to give me a chance to explain myself, to defend myself, to make up for it. I ask you to talk to me, to answer me, to give me your news.

I suggest we meet again to calmly discuss our situation, without arguing or reproaching us for anything. I think we need to talk to each other and listen to each other. I think we need to understand what happened and what we want. I think we need to give ourselves a second chance.

I will give you time to read my letter and think about my proposal. I hope that you will respond positively and that you will agree to see me again. You are the person I love most in the world and I don’t want to lose you.

Your love waiting for you.

Sample letter to get your ex back who cheated on you

Did your ex cheat on you with someone else? Are you betrayed and you want to make him understand your suffering? Here is a sample letter to get back your ex who cheated on you:

My dear,

I am writing this letter to you to tell you how betrayed and devastated I am by your infidelity. You cheated on me with someone else, you lied to me, you betrayed me. You broke our trust, our complicity, our love. You destroyed our relationship, our project, our future.

I don’t understand how you could do this, how you could do this to me. What made you cheat on me? What did you find in this person that you didn’t find in me? How do you feel about him/her? What do you feel about me? What do you really want?

I ask you to explain your actions to me, to tell me the truth, the whole truth. I ask you to tell me if you regret your mistake, if you are ready to assume the consequences, if you are ready to repair the damage. I ask you to tell me if you still love me, if you still want to be with me, if you still want to save our relationship.

I suggest that we meet again to discuss our situation honestly, without lying to us or hiding anything from us. I think we need to come clean and take stock of our feelings. I think we need to decide together about the future of our relationship. I think we need to give ourselves a second chance.

I will give you time to read my letter and think about my proposal. I hope that you will respond positively and that you will agree to see me again. You are the person I love most in the world and I don’t want to lose you.

Your love who loves you.

Here are 4 effective letter models to win back your ex in different situations. Of course, these models are not perfect or universal. They must be adapted to your case and your style. The main thing is to write from your heart, without being afraid to reveal yourself or show yourself vulnerable. You will see that a letter can do miracles to get your ex back!

Also discover: Get your ex back quickly (SMS – LETTERS): 4 simple steps

Conclusion:

You understand, writing a letter to get your ex back can be an excellent idea to win back the heart of the one you love. This allows you to take a step back, apologize, be sincere and positive, and reconnect gently. But be careful, you have to follow certain rules to write an effective letter that will make your ex fall for you.

We hope this article will help you write a letter to win back your ex and relaunch your relationship. Don’t hesitate to write your letter and send it to your ex without delay.

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