Infidelity is one of the worst blows you can receive in a relationship. Discovering that the person you love has betrayed you with someone else is a very painful ordeal, which calls into question all the confidence and self-esteem that you had built.
But how do I know if my wife is really cheating on me? What are the signs that should alert me? And what should I do if I discover his adultery?
In this article, we will give you some tips for detecting possible infidelity on the part of your wife, as well as advice on how to react in the best possible way to this situation. We will also see how to try to save your relationship if you wish, or how to turn the page if you decide to break up.
- How do I know if my wife is cheating on me and what to do if she is?
- My wife is cheating on me, what to do: Leave her! The 5 reasons
- My wife is cheating on me: How to turn the page and find love again? The 5 tips
- How to prevent infidelity in your relationship?
- My wife is cheating on me: How to react to your lover?
- How to manage the impact on children? The 5 recommendations
- My wife is cheating on me: How to win her back if you still love her?
How do I know if my wife is cheating on me and what to do if she is?
Signs that my wife is cheating on me
There is no hard proof to know if your wife is cheating on you, unless she confesses to you or you catch her in the act. However, there are some signs that may alert you and encourage you to dig deeper.
👉 Here are the most common:
She changes her behavior:
She becomes more distant, more secretive, more irritable, or on the contrary more attentive and more cuddly than before. She changes her habits, her schedules, her tastes, her appearance. She goes out more often without you, she spends more time on her phone or computer, she hides her messages or calls.
She avoids physical contact:
She no longer wants to make love with you, or on the contrary she becomes more passionate and more daring in bed. She appears less affectionate, less tender, less complicit. She no longer kisses you, no longer takes your hand, no longer looks you in the eyes.
It constantly justifies itself:
She gives you convoluted explanations to explain her absences, her lateness, her expenses. She lies to you about her activities, her relationships, her plans. She gets defensive when you ask her questions, she accuses you of not trusting her, she diverts the conversation.
If you notice several of these signs in your wife, there is a good chance that she is cheating on you or is about to. You should therefore talk to him calmly and try to understand what is happening before accusing him of infidelity.
How do I know if my wife is cheating on me on WhatsApp? The 5 tips
WhatsApp is a very popular messaging application that makes it easy to communicate with your contacts. But it is also an application that can be used to deceive one’s spouse, by exchanging messages, photos, videos or calls with a lover or mistress.
👉 Here are the 5 tips to find out:
Observe his behavior:
The first tip is to observe your wife’s behavior when she uses WhatsApp. Is she hiding to check her messages? Does she delete her chat history? Does she change her phone’s PIN or unlock pattern? Does she receive or send messages at unusual times? If you notice one or more of these signs, it may be suspicious.
Check his contacts:
The second tip is to check your wife’s contacts on WhatsApp. Does she talk to people you don’t know or don’t hang out with? Did she add foreign or unknown numbers? Does she communicate often with the same contact? If you notice one or more of these signs, it may be telling.
Access their account:
The third tip is to access your wife’s WhatsApp account. To do this, you must have access to their phone and scan the QR code displayed on the web page https://web.whatsapp.com/ from your computer. You will then be able to read your wife’s messages and conversations as if it were your own account.
Use a spy app:
The fourth tip is to use a spy app to monitor your wife’s WhatsApp activities. There are specialized applications that allow you to record your wife’s conversations, calls, photos, videos and GPS location on WhatsApp. You will be able to access all this information from your phone or computer. All you need to do is install the app on your wife’s phone and create an online account.
Talk to her:
The fifth tip is to talk to your wife and ask her directly if she is cheating on you on WhatsApp. If you have doubts or suspicions, it is better to express them calmly and honestly than to remain in uncertainty and suffering. Ask him to show you his messages and contacts on WhatsApp. If she accepts, it’s because she has nothing to hide. If she refuses, it’s because she has something to reproach herself for.
My wife is cheating on me, what to do: Leave her! The 5 reasons
You have just discovered that your wife is cheating on you and you are wondering if you should forgive her or leave her. The answer is simple: leave her without hesitation!
👉 5 reasons why you should not stay with an unfaithful woman
She doesn’t respect you:
By deceiving you, she violated your dignity, your honor, your trust. She didn’t take your feelings, your needs, your expectations into account. She preferred her selfish pleasure to your common happiness. She doesn’t deserve your respect or your love.
She doesn’t like you:
She really loved you, she wouldn’t have needed to look anywhere else. She would have been faithful, loyal, sincere. She would have sought to resolve the problems in your relationship instead of running away from them. She would have been attentive, understanding, devoted. She failed to appreciate your value or your commitment.
It will not change:
If she cheated on you once, she will do it again. Infidelity is often a sign of a deep problem, of a lack of maturity, of chronic dissatisfaction, of emotional instability. It is very rare for an unfaithful woman to question herself and radically change her behavior. She will start lying to you again, betraying you, making you suffer.
It prevents you from moving forward:
By staying with a woman who cheats on you, you lock yourself into a toxic, unhealthy, destructive relationship. You are wasting your time, your energy, your self-esteem. You deprive yourself of the possibility of meeting another woman who will be a better match for you, who will respect you and who will truly love you.
It endangers your health:
By having sexual relations with other men, she exposes herself to the risk of sexually transmitted diseases. And if she doesn’t protect herself, she can also infect you. Not to mention the risk of unwanted pregnancy or hidden paternity. You cannot take these kinds of risks for your physical and mental health.
My wife is cheating on me: How to turn the page and find love again? The 5 tips
You have just discovered that your wife is cheating on you and you have decided to leave her. You are devastated, sad, angry, but also relieved to end this toxic relationship. You wonder how to turn the page and find love again. The answer is simple: you have to take care of yourself and move forward.
👉 Here are 5 tips for rebuilding yourself after infidelity:
Cut off all contact with her:
The first thing to do to move on is to cut all contact with your ex-wife. Don’t talk to her anymore, don’t see her anymore, don’t follow her on social media. Also avoid places or people that remind you of him. Clear your surroundings and your head to mourn the loss of your relationship.
Express your emotions:
Then you must express your emotions and release your suffering. Don’t keep everything to yourself, don’t pretend everything is okay. Cry, scream, write, draw, play sports, do what feels good. Also talk to your loved ones, your friends, your family. They are there to listen to you, support you, comfort you.
Take care of yourself :
To regain your confidence and self-esteem, you need to take care of yourself. Do things that please you, that make you happy, that make you laugh. Take care of your body, your health, your appearance. Make yourself beautiful, treat yourself, do yourself good. Show yourself that you are a good, valiant, kind person.
Open up to others:
To get out of your isolation and sadness, you must open up to others. Meet new people, do new activities, get out of your comfort zone. Be curious, sociable, generous. Make friends, contacts, relationships. Show yourself that the world is big, rich, interesting.
Give yourself time:
Finally, to find love again, you have to give yourself time. Don’t rush into a new relationship out of fear of being alone or a desire for revenge. Don’t compare new people you meet to your ex-wife. Don’t try to repeat the same pattern or avoid the same failure. Give yourself time to heal, to heal, to mature.
Also read: Casual relationship: 6 rules to follow to avoid regrets!
How to prevent infidelity in your relationship?
You have already been the victim of infidelity in the past. You are wondering how to prevent infidelity in your relationship and how to strengthen your romantic bond.
Communicate with her:
Communication is the key to a strong and lasting relationship. Talk to your wife about your feelings, your needs, your expectations, your desires. Listen to her too, be attentive to what she feels, to what she wishes, to what she desires. Share your joys, your sorrows, your dreams, your projects. Be sincere, honest, respectful.
Surprise her:
Routine is the enemy of couples. To prevent it from taking hold, you need to surprise your wife regularly. Give him gifts, compliments, attention. Organize outings, trips, getaways. Innovate in bed, try new positions, new games. Show him that you are creative, romantic, passionate.
Respect:
Respect is the basis of a healthy and balanced relationship. Respect your wife as a person, as a woman, as a partner. Respect their opinions, their choices, their tastes, their differences. Respect their space, their time, their privacy. Don’t judge her, don’t criticize her, don’t put her down. Show him that you are tolerant, caring, admiring.
Support her:
Support is the cement of a united and complicit couple. Support your wife in her projects, her ambitions, her challenges. Support her in her difficulties, her problems, her trials. Support her in her passions, her hobbies, her leisure activities. Encourage her, motivate her, help her. Show him that you are present, supportive, devoted.
Love it:
Love is the driving force behind a happy and fulfilled couple. Love your wife like the first day, like it’s the last time. Love her with all your heart, with all your body, with all your soul. Love her unconditionally, without limits, without restriction. Tell him, show him, prove it to him. Show him that you are faithful, loyal, sincere.
My wife is cheating on me: How to react to your lover?
👉 The answer is simple: you must remain calm and dignified.
Don’t provoke him:
The first thing to avoid is provoking your wife’s lover, whether verbally or physically. Do not throw insults, threats or challenges at him. Don’t hit him, don’t shove him, don’t chase him. You would only lower yourself to his level and get yourself into trouble. Stay in control of yourself and your emotions.
Don’t blame him:
The second thing to avoid is blaming your wife’s lover, as if he were the only one responsible for her infidelity. Don’t blame him for seducing your wife, for breaking up your relationship, for ruining your life. Don’t ask him to apologize, to justify himself, to withdraw. You would only give it importance and devalue yourself. Stay proud of yourself and your values.
Don’t compare it:
The third thing to avoid is comparing your wife’s lover with yourself, as if he is better or worse than you. Don’t ask yourself what he has more or less than you, what he does better or worse than you, what he brings or takes away from your wife. You would only torture your mind and make yourself more self-conscious. Stay confident in yourself and your strengths.
Don’t question it:
The fourth thing to avoid is questioning your wife’s lover about the details of their relationship, as if he can enlighten you on what happened. Don’t ask him how long he’s been seeing her, where he’s been seeing her, how he’s seeing her, what he feels about her. You would only inflict more pain and humiliation on yourself. Remain indifferent to him and his actions.
Do not fear him:
The fifth thing to avoid is fearing your wife’s lover, as if he could take your place or harm you. Don’t think he’s stronger, smarter, more attractive than you. Don’t think that he will continue to see your wife, influence your wife, manipulate your wife. You would only empower him and weaken yourself. Stay strong in the face of him and the situation.
How to manage the impact on children? The 5 recommendations
You wonder how to manage the impact of his infidelity on them and how best to protect them. The answer is simple: you have to be honest and reassuring.
👉 Here are the 5 recommendations for managing the impact of your wife’s infidelity on your children:
- Don’t hide the truth from them:
Don’t hide the truth from them about what’s going on between you and your wife. Don’t lie to them, don’t make excuses for them, don’t make them think everything is okay. You would only deceive and disappoint them. Tell them the truth in simple, age-appropriate words. Explain to them that your wife cheated on you, that you are sad and angry, that you may be separating.
2.Don’t involve them in the conflict:
Don’t involve them in the conflict between you and your wife. Do not use them as weapons, shields, messengers. Don’t force them to take sides, to choose a side, to testify. Do not expose them to arguments, shouting or violence. You would only hurt and traumatize them. Keep them out of conflict and respect their neutrality.
3. Don’t make them feel guilty:
Don’t blame them for what happened between you and your wife. Don’t make them feel that they are responsible, that they failed, that they failed. Don’t blame them for having loved your wife, for having been close to her, for having been accomplices with her. Don’t ask them to deny their mother or hate her. You would only make them anxious and destabilized. Reassure them of their innocence and importance.
4. Do not neglect them :
Do not neglect them during this difficult time. Do not forget them, do not abandon them, do not reject them. Do not deprive them of your presence, your attention, your affection. Don’t leave them alone, to fend for themselves, to withdraw. You would only isolate and weaken them. Take care of them, listen to them, cuddle them. Show them that you are there for them and that you love them.
5.Don’t stop them from loving:
Do not prevent them from loving their mother despite her infidelity. Don’t forbid them from seeing her, talking to her, writing to her. Don’t force them to run away from it, to ignore it, to forget it. Don’t take away their right to have a relationship with her or her new family. You would only frustrate and divide them. Let them love their mother as they want and as they can.
My wife is cheating on me: How to win her back if you still love her?
Yet, despite her betrayal, you still love her and you don’t want to lose her. You wonder if you can win her back and give her another chance. The answer is yes, but under certain conditions.
👉Here are the 5 steps to try to save your relationship after infidelity:
Take stock of your relationship:
Before you embark on winning back, you must first understand why your wife cheated on you. What were the problems in your relationship? What was he missing? What could you have done differently? Make an objective and honest analysis of your relationship, without accusing yourself or overwhelming him.
Communicate with her:
Then you need to talk with your wife and express your feelings to her. Tell him that you are hurt, disappointed, angry, but also that you still love him and want to give him a second chance. Ask her what she feels, what she expects, what she regrets. Listen to her without judging or interrupting her.
Set clear rules:
If your wife agrees to stay with you, you must establish clear rules to rebuild your relationship. For example, she must cut all contact with her lover, give you access to her phone or social networks, tell you where she is going and with whom. For your part, you must trust her, not harass or monitor her, and not dwell on the past.
Work on your relationship:
To regain the complicity and passion of before, you must work on your relationship on a daily basis. Do activities together, share quality time, surprise each other, compliment each other, support each other. Strengthen your communication, your intimacy, your life project. Show her that you are willing to change and improve for her.
Get help if needed:
Sometimes it is difficult to overcome infidelity alone. If you feel like you can’t do it, don’t hesitate to call a professional. A couples therapist or coach can help you express your emotions, resolve your conflicts, restore your confidence and reignite your desire. He can also give you personalized advice adapted to your situation.